There's a Spouse in My House - Excerpt
There's a Spouse in my House cover

Excerpted from Chapter 2:

So These Hand Towels are Merely Decorative and Never to Be Used, Right? Adjusting to Cohabitation

There will, naturally, be some growing pains that come with the cohabitation situation.  Annoying personal habits, in particular, will have to be addressed now that you’ll be living together forever.  At one point in time, before you were married, these personal habits seemed as cute as a baby bear; now they seem as scary as an adult bear that wants to eat you.  And it’s often difficult to find the right moment to discuss these problems because one of you thinks, “I’m sure Ted will figure out that I hate it when he burps in bed” while the other one thinks, “How psyched is Liz that she’s married to the burping champion?” 

One solution might be to write down three things you’d like the other person to do to keep the household running smoothly.  Once you’re done, you swap lists.  That conversation will go something like this:

Wife:Okay, the toilet paper thing is a big problem for me.  If you use up a roll, it would be great if you could put a new roll in the bathroom.
Husband:I totally understand.  I’ll make a big effort to fix that.
Wife:Thanks.  And, ideally, put the toilet paper onto the holder.  Please don’t just leave it on top of the toilet, because I always knock it over and it rolls all over the floor.
Husband:Okay, that’s two things from your list.  Can I give you one from mine?
Wife:That’s only one thing in my list.
Husband:No, it’s two.  Replace the roll and put it onto the holder.
Wife:That all falls under the toilet paper topic.
Husband:Well, then, for one of my requests, I’d like to be able to ignore your request about putting the toilet paper in the holder.
Wife:You can’t use your list to cancel out my list!
Husband:Yes I can, because that’s the second request on my list – I want to be able to use my list to cancel out your list.

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